Once again, Marveling at the Hand of God

Come Thou fount of every blessing tune my heart to sing Thy grace
Streams of mercy never ceasing call for songs of loudest praise.
Teach me some melodious sonnet sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount I'm fixed upon it mount of Thy redeeming love.

Here I raise my Ebenezer, here by Thy great help I've come.
And I hope by Thy good pleasure safely to arrive at home.
Jesus sought me when a stranger, wandering from the fold of God.
He to rescue me from danger interposed His precious blood

Oh to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constraint to be!
Let Thy goodness like a fetter; bind my wandering heart to thee.
Prone to wander Lord I feel it prone to leave the God I love.
Here's my heart Oh take and seal it.  Seal it for thy courts above.

I sang this hymn at church this past Sunday.  A Canadian church, pastured by an East Indian converted Seik, sitting between two young addicts.  Both young ladies wanted to go to church today, persevering amidst their methadone* drowsiness & lethargy, wanting to respond to a yearning deep within them.  Jesus sought me when a stranger, wandering from the fold of God. He to rescue me from danger interposed His precious blood. These words really grabbed me today.  I was overwhelmed by the presence of God who in spite of the continued pull of the things of this world, will still draw them to Himself.  Jackie, is 4 months pregnant, has a common law husband/boyfriend in prison.  She has night terrors too often that disrupt her sleep and send her into depression.  When she was young, her stepfather used to wake her up in the night and make her watch him beat her mother.  He would also beat her and her siblings.  Dena has one foot in a life trying to recover from her addictions and abuses, but still with her other foot out there.  She is pulled by the lure of money falling back into her old lifestyle.  I kept my arm around her during much of the service to steady her as the effects of the methadone kept pulling her to sleep.  It was my joy to be with these girls there, ushering them into the presence of the Lord.  After, they thanked me and said it made them feel good to be there. Neither one of them had been to church in a long time.   It is no small task for girls like them to come to church.  A church where families consist of mom and dad and cute, well dressed children.  A church where everyone dresses just so, and looks just so.  Did these girls fit in? NO did they stand out? YES I praise God that they didn’t let that pressure keep them from coming.  God loved having them there!!  He received them with open arms!!     Oh to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constraint to be!  Let Thy goodness like a fetter; bind my wandering heart to thee.  We all come to Jesus as a sinner, in need of grace.  All of our hearts get pulled away from the Lord from time to time.  I pray that we all will take our wandering hearts back to the one who loved us and died for us.

* Methadone is a narcotic pain reliever, similar to morphine. It also reduces withdrawal symptoms in people addicted to heroin or other narcotic drugs without causing the "high" associated with the drug addiction.

Firsts for Me, HUGE victories for Cindy

Today I experienced some firsts.  I walked with a young lady through a difficult and low point in her recovery.  Cindy (not her real name) came to our safe house about 5 days ago, having about 25 days clean and sober.  She has lived homeless on the streets, supporting her addictions by selling drugs and being sexually exploited for much of the past 10 years.  She is pregnant, in her first trimester, after giving birth to a second child only 4 months ago.

I was reminded of Psalms 37:23,24 towards the end of this day: If the Lord delights in a man's way, He makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with His hand.

Today I had the privilege of accompanying her to a court hearing concerning the adoption of her second child.  I went into it knowing that this would be a very rough day for her.  I didn’t know if she would bolt and run when she got a chance or not.  To make the situation more difficult, we had to go into the Downtown Vancouver area right in the midst of where she spent most of her years on the streets.  She was nervous about seeing old drug buddies, former “bosses” and places where she used and got loaded.  All these things could be major triggers for her to “cut and run”.  How would I handle that?  Good question – one that I hoped I wouldn’t have to answer.  

Sure enough not long after we had gotten off the one hour ride on the subway train into downtown, she began to see people she knew.  As we were walking the 6 blocks to the court house, she gave me a running commentary.  “I used to smoke crack with that guy”  “There’s a guy that used to be my boss – I still owe him money”  “That is the alley I used to sleep in, in those doorways”  “I know that girl, she is loaded and bad news”   I could go on, but you get the picture?  She was even approached by an acquaintance of hers to go to his apartment right then and smoke some crack.

I was so proud of her for facing these huge giants and walking away from them.  Was she afraid?  Yes   Was she nervous and jittery?  Yes   But did she have the courage to refuse to be dragged down by them, give in to the fear?  YES!!!!  I was able to walk along side her, encourage her to stay focused on our mission.  I was able to help her see that each time she turned away from a potential threat; she was making a successful decision, she was making a healthy choice, the right choice.

On our way back from downtown Vancouver, we had to make a stop at a government tax office to pick up some paperwork of hers.  While we were waiting for this office to open, we sat on a stoop outside so she could have smoke a cigarette.  She saw an empty package of cigarettes where we were going to sit, so she picked it up to toss it aside.  It felt heavy to her so she looked inside.  There was a crack pipe in it, and beside it, a special kind of lighter used with crack pipes.  HUGE trigger right smack in her hands!!!  She immediately gasped and threw it into the bushes, overcome with pretty panicky emotions.  After we processed the situation and she clearly knew she was choosing again to do the right thing, she was able to admit that if I hadn’t been with her, she would have taken it, gotten some crack somewhere and gotten loaded.  EVEN knowing she shouldn’t.  EVEN knowing it would have sent her into major relapse.  PRAISE GOD she wasn’t alone, that she was safe with a person she could trust to walk with her and help her make the right choices.  There will come a time when she won’t be with a support person, and these very things will come up again.  I pray that when that time comes, she will be far enough in her recovery and healthy enough to continue to make those right decisions.  TODAY she had HUGE successes!!!!  TODAY she stayed safe!!!  TODAY she is off the streets, off drugs and NOT being sexually exploited!!!
I was also drawn to Psalm 37:39,40 -  The salvation of the righteous comes from the Lord; He is their stronghold in time of trouble.  The Lord helps them and delivers them; The Lord helps them and delivers them; He delivers them from the wicked and saves them, because they take refuge in Him.   AMEN, AMEN, AMEN!!!!